First day of ABC has gone well, my net is 247 calories. I am thinking i might do some exercise to get into minus calories. I have been so strong today. My downfall peanuts, my mother bought some probably expecting me to eat them but i turned away and declined! Well i came upstairs, i removed myself from the tempation so now i don't really give a shit about peanuts but when there right there, argh i just cant help myself!

Im going to see my sister tomorrow, so i will be the big sister for the day looking after her! Were going to watch films all day! Which is nice but that means im gunna have to do little exercise when i could of been running or something. Oh well.

I am so nervous for monday, becuase i have to phone people for interviews how stupid is that. But i hate speaking on the phone but what i hate more than speaking on the phone is other people listening to me on the phone. Which will happen becuase i am in a rather large office! Why do i get so anxious over nothing!

I'm sorry i cut today, because i really hated myself. I felt so numb this morning like so dead. I didn't feel real at all. Well i'm 0 days clean. Such a failure, so weak.

I starting reading Winter girls, it is amazing! I love reading it because it reminds me of me, i can relate to it. To be honest i'm not sure if thats a good thing or a bad thing. If you haven't read it, do it is great!

Stay strong and no effing peanuts!

Bekah

xxx